Tuesday, November 4, 2014

The Fall Pt 2: Skating on top of the Hill


Yesterday’s blog took some of us down memory lane.  I talked about growing up in the Fillmore District of San Francisco which was surrounded by hills where I learned to roller skate, skate board and ride a bike.  As young as six years old, I decided I wanted to accomplish something (learn to skate and keep up with the “big kids”) and that quitting wasn’t an option.  I had an “aha” yesterday morning while sharing my blog with you which was the fact that no one gave me a lesson on tenacity, nor do I remember anyone saying “Tania, if you start something, don’t quit.”  Where did my little six year old mind come up with this?  How does a six year old take on such a huge fete (learning to skate on top of a hill)?  Where did that resolve come from?  It was instilled in me when I was assigned to earth along with all of the other gifts that God gave me (e.g. administration, teaching, storytelling, etc.) 

“I knew you before I formed you in your mother’s womb.  Before you were born I set you apart and appointed you as my prophet to the nations.”  Jeremiah 1:5 (NLT)

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.  James 1:17 (NIV)

Tania Not Tanya nugget:  For clarity, I have good sense.  I don’t set expectations for myself that are totally unrealistic, however, I will push myself and reach for things outside my grasp that I am passionate about and that are within the will of God.  Like, I’m not gonna decide I want to obtain my Masters in political science within the next six weeks.  That would be retarded.  1) political science doesn’t interest me; 2) even if it did that would be an impossible fete.  Or, I’m not gonna set an unrealistic goal to go from a size 8 to a size 2 in three weeks.  What would be the point? To disappear or look like a dope fiend? 

Can you imagine how much resolve it took for an inexperienced six year old to decide she wanted to learn to skate on a hill?  Obviously when I think of it now, I probably wouldn’t have done it, but back then I was ignorant of the fear.  I saw something that I wanted it and I went after it.   I had no idea how I was going to accomplish this fete, but there were resources around me that I was willing to employ.   For example:

The Big Kids:  I don’t have any recollection of anyone taking advantage of me and unless my older sister (by ten years) threatened them all and told them they better not mistreat me I think it’s safe to say that I must have been likable kid.  Some of them let me try their riding gear out and demonstrated how to use the items.

My Mom:  I didn’t have the resources but I knew who did, my mom (via my Dad).  Mom was a domestic engineer (they called it a housewife back then) and my dad was a self-employed barber.  He had a real barber’s license, a barbershop and people who paid booth rent to him.  Whether I articulated it accurately or not, I have no idea but she had enough information to assist me.  Mind you I wasn’t a spoiled brat that got everything I wanted and we weren’t rich, but we weren’t poor either, we were somewhere in the middle.  My mother never would have known that I had a desire for the roller skates, skate board, etc. if I had not made my request known to her.  I could have thought about my desires; wished for them; hinted around about them, but it was not until I opened my mouth and made my request specific to her that the desire was fulfilled.  Here’s the thing, had I articulated exactly what I wanted, I’m sure I would have gotten it.  But because I didn’t know that there were multiple brands of skateboards and because I wasn’t with her to say “no, not that one Mom, I want this one because it’s like the “big kids”, she purchased what she believed was appropriate for me. 

Don’t worry about anything, but pray about everything. With thankful hearts offer up your prayers and requests to God.  Philippians 4:6 (NLT)

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At six years old, I had a deep burning desire that was unquenchable and would only be satisfied with what I wanted to achieve.  While I could have fallen out and had a temper tantrum or become angry with everyone around me because I couldn’t do what they were doing; or decided that because I didn’t have what they had I might as well give up.  No, at six years old I made a decision that I wasn’t going to let the lack of resources or experience stop me from achieving my goal of skating on the hill.  Instead I was inspired to figure out how to make it happen, at six years old.

Yet you don’t have what you want because you don’t ask God for it.  James 4:2b (NLT)

It amazes me that things we experienced (positive or negative) can still have an impact on our lives as adults.  What’s even more ironic is that some of the negative things we experienced can literally be the fuel that gets us going if and only if we use it as a life lesson on avoiding that negativity rather than embracing it. 

Today, I have that same tenacity and “no quit” attitude which drives me to reach my goals no matter what they are.  When I the thought of quitting pops in my head, this little voice reminds me that quitting is not an option, seriously, it’s like there is an automatic notification that goes off when I’m getting close to the “quit” threshold and then I get a second wind, stand up straight and I keep goin.

In His New Excellence,

Tania not Tanya

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