We have been inundated with recycling campaigns for
things like aluminum, paper, compost which many Bay Area counties force upon
consumers. But there are also other
items that can be recycled which have some type of reward attached to it: appliances, athletic shoes, batteries, clothes,
compact fluorescent bulbs (CFLs), computers and electronics, eyeglasses, foam
packing: ink/toner cartridges, phones, clothes hangers (your local dry
cleaners is generally happy to re-purpose wire hangers and/or safety pins). You can even receive a reward for recycling arguments. Huh?
Yes, you heard me. Arguments can
be recycled but the reward varies from things as small as silence for the rest
of the evening by the person who was dumped on to as much as a full blown beat
down or even worse an extra hole or opening in your body that you weren’t born
with. Recycled arguments seem to have
been the Three Amigo’s strategy, but it didn’t work.
Let’s
pick up at Chapter 32: The Three Amigos,
Eliphaz, Bildad and Zophar, had finally run empty on words, the well of
accusation was finally all dried up.
Frustrated to no end and feelin like utter fools I am sure, because with
all of their “wisdom” and eloquence of speech Job wouldn’t budge an inch
towards admitting his guilt so they fell silent to defeat.
However,
there was a fourth man, Elihu, who it seems had witnessed the entire accusation
campaign, silently cheering for the Three Amigos only to become more frustrated
as the days wore on because the elders had made no progress. They talked a good game about how they were
gonna wear Job down and convince him that he must admit his wrong, but they
didn’t even come close. That was it, he
couldn’t take any more of this nonsense.
He
finally decides to speak but when he does, he starts off on “10”. Why is he so angry? He was highly offended by the ineffectiveness
of the Amigos, his elders. I also believe
he sees their “humanness” which may have scared him or burst his bubble, like
OMG, they aren’t infallible. When he realized
the Amigos had exhausted their arguments, he exploded with pent-up anger.
Chapter
33: In my sanctified imagination this is
how I imagine Elihu finally speaks to Job:
“Hey Job, Bruh, I need to holla
at ya about something. I been had this
on my mind and I gotta keep it one hunid.
If you think you can prove me wrong, I won’t have no problem with it,
lay it out there Bruh, stand up for yourself.
I’m not trying to say I’m no bigger than you. We both made out of the same kind of mud. I put my robes on one sleeve at a time just
like you. Let’s work through this
together Bruh and don’t be offended by my passion, it’s just how I flow. Is that cool?”

Verses
8-11: Elihu’s interpretation of Job’s
comments were wrong just as the Amigos.
They claim he said he was pure when in fact Job said on more than one
occasion that he was a sinner which is one of the reasons he offered sacrifices
to God, duh!!! Elihu accuses Job of
being self-righteous just like the Three Amigos – sounds like the same recycled
argument to me.
Verses
12-30: Young Bruh, Elihu, begins his speech with a well-known fact which is
that God is greater than me. That’s not
even a discussion on the table, it’s not up for debate, it goes without
saying. What is the point young
Bruh? Then he goes on and on about the
way God works. Well, first of all, God
does amazing customized things all the time, it’s really kind of hard to put
him in a box and say he does X Y Z and 1 2 3 because if there is one thing that
I know about God, as soon as you think you’ve got him figured out, he’ll put a
spin on that thing and leave you there scratchin your head, “down hem”. I know I have to stop, but you’ve gotta hear
the summation of these last two verses:
Verses
31-33: In my sanctified imagination, I’m
thinking that perhaps Elihu gets the sense or maybe even sees Job’s face all
bunched up trying to figure out what in the world this young Bruh is talking
about. And then he asks himself: “Does the boy just like to hear himself talk
or what?” By now Job can’t tell whether
he’d rather hear the old school rhetoric from the Amigos or have someone take a
pin and pop open his boils. As he
continues the conversation in his head: “This kid won’t shut up!!! Wait; Did he
just tell me to shut up because he’s not finished and that he’s going to teach
me about the basics of wisdom?” Job bit
his tongue to keep from saying anything out loud and then he had another crazy
thought: “OK, God, am I being punked? Is that what it is?” Job stood up.
He looked behind himself to see if anyone was there. He didn’t see a
camera crew or Ashton. “Oh snap, cameras
haven’t been invented yet. I know, maybe
I’ll pinch myself to make sure I’m dreaming.
This just has to be one long continuous nightmare.” Meanwhile everyone is looking at Job like he’s
crazy because it is apparent that he has completely tuned Elihu out, he’s
mumbling and pinching himself. Cognizant
of their stares, he returns to the reality of the noise coming out of Elihu’s
mouth, and tries to refocus and it is then when he hears him say: “If you think of anything I should know, tell
me. Otherwise keep listening, don’t
distract me with interruptions.” Job
thought to himself again: “so is that a trick statement? How can I tell him anything unless I
interrupt him if he won’t shut up?” I’m
confused, I think I’ll just sit here and tune him completely out.
I’m
out of time, we’ll have to pick it up next time.
In
His New Excellence,
Tania
Not Tanya
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